


Robin & Crusoe

by yuletide_archivist



Category: Young Justice
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2006-12-16
Updated: 2006-12-16
Packaged: 2018-01-25 03:07:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,854
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1628327
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yuletide_archivist/pseuds/yuletide_archivist
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Robin and Superboy are stranded on a desert planet, where they must rely on their wits to survive.<br/>God help them.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Robin & Crusoe

**Author's Note:**

> Written for calliopes_pen

 

 

Day 2

Tim had just finished setting up their shelter. It wasn't much, just several lengths of wood formed haphazardly into something that reminded Kon more of Eeyore's home than an actual structure, but he supposed it would do.

Even though that's what he supposed, what he said was "Are you sure we can't just live in the caves? Hell, our ancestors used to do it. Hence the name `cavemen'. And they had Raquel Welch in a fur bikini, so they must've had something going for `em."

"We don't know what could be lurking in the caves," Tim explained patiently. "An exterior shelter is our best compromise between..."

"Dude, listen to yourself. You sound like Robocop, only not as endearing." Tim shot him a shoot. Kon held up his hands in mock surrender. "I'm just saying you need to unclench. You know, try not be such a spud. We're all alone in an alternate dimension, I won't tell anyone."

"I sound like Robocop?" Tim repeated after a pause; Kon nodded. "Well, you sound like Steph."

"Your girlfriend, Steph?" This time it was Tim's turn to nod. "Try to avoid any other comparisons, okay? Creepy enough being stuck with Batman Junior without the thought that you're gonna make me your prison wife... or desolate wasteland wife... whatever."

"I'll try to resist."

Tim put another log in place and Kon slapped a thick lather of wet mud onto either end. The rest of the mud had already dried, forming a sun-caked foundation for their new house.

"So, how long we gonna be staying here?" Kon asked for the millionth time.

"Depends. Assuming they find this world... which is the hard part, considering we were traveling through Hypertime when the accident took place... we've managed to make camp at one of the more recognizable landmarks I could find and most of my locator beacons are working."

Kon looked up at the large plateau whose shadow they had found shelter in. "Day's walk just to get here... damn well better be a landmark." He turned back to Tim. "Okay, so finding the planet... how would you do that, if it were you?"

"I'm sure I wouldn't know."

"You know it worries me when you say that about anything? I mean, c'mon, you know how to make crepes."

"They're an important body-building meal!" Tim said defensively.

"Yeah, how can I doubt that with your Herculean physique? C'mon, Tim, give me _something_."

Tim gave him a hard look. "For the foreseeable future, we're stuck here. Deal with it."

Day 5

Tim had spent the last two hours unraveling a single thread from his triple-weave cape and threading it through his bo staff to form an impromptu fishing pole (why oh why hadn't he taken his survival utility belt?) when Kon crested the rocky pass they had formed their shelter on.

"I think I'm starting to get you, man," he said, sitting down on the riverbank. Tim had waded into the river up to his knees, pants rolled up and ninja boots left on the banks.

"What's to get? I'm `Batman Junior'."

"No, no, you're not. You're like... Batman's Nephew, at the most. You've got issues, but I could actually see you getting into a lasting relationship. My brain just kinda freezes if I think of Batman walking down the aisle, but you could totally settle down with Steph, raise a whole nest of kids..."

Tim made another cast. He'd seen evidence of marine life and hopefully at least one of them, something edible if he was lucky, would bite. "What's your point?"

"My point is that now you're in survival mode. You think you have to be like Batman to get along. Maybe you do. But I hope you don't think you have to cover for me. I can take care of myself."

"Uh-huh."

"What? I can prove it!" Kon took a step towards Tim, but stopped when his feet began to sink into the wet sand. He backtracked. "Just give me a job."

"You want a job?" Slinging the makeshift fishing pole over his shoulder, Tim reached down and irritably snatched a fish out of the water. He held it in his hand, watching it wiggle in the dry desert air. "Start a fire. We've got dinner to eat."

Day 7

"'We've got dinner to eat,'" Kon said to himself, imitating Tim's voice in a nasal whine. "Who does he think he is? Strand him on one alien world and he thinks he has to go into lockdown on all human emotions. Hate to say it, but..." He shouted out at the top of his lungs. " **That's a serious douche move!** "

He turned around. The rock laid in the distance, about the size of his thumb when he held his hand up to his face. A good three hundred yards. No way Tim could've heard him.

Climbing up to the top of a sand dune, Kon looked around. He had noticed tracks on the way to their rock, tracks that Tim had ignored. Kon may not have been "nature boy wonder," but he knew tracks when he saw them. And tracks meant animals. Animals meant food. How hard was that to figure out?

Kon knelt down to examine the tracks. Cupping a handful of sand in his hand, he brought it close to his face and let it fall through his fingers. Well, that didn't help.

"Think, Superboy!" he chided himself. "Those are the toes. Toes show which way you're going, right? So if I follow the toes, I'll catch up to it!"

He stood up, tucking the large killing rock he had found under his arm. "Your ass is mine, you toe-y thing."

It seemed like it took forever, but at long last the rock shrunk out of view and he came upon a small creature, sitting expectantly. It was about the size of a puppy and similar in most respects, right down to its floppy ears and multiple eyes (it had six instead of two, but who's counting?).

"Hey there, little fella." Kon took a step closer to the creature. "Where's your daddy, huh? I need to make him into tasty meat so I can impress my friend Tim with my outdoorsmanship." Suddenly, Kon realized this would make the creature an orphan. "Older brother, maybe? Friend of the family? Enemy of the family? I'm not picky."

He bent down to scratch behind its three ears. "Awww, who's a cute little alien monster? You are! Yes you are! Yes you are!"

That's when he noticed that his hand was sticking to the creature. He tried to pull away, but the creature only clung harder to him. For a moment, they stared at each other, trying to sort out the relationship between them, then the flesh and bones of the creature broke down gelatinously to run up his forearm with an impossible suction.

"Uh... help?" Kon said under his breath, now pulling more desperately. He succeeded in wrenching the creature off its perch, but where it had been sitting some kind of... root was sunken into the ground. The root extended from the creature's lower half to deep into the ground. Kon tugged harder... and the root tugged back, yanking him off his feet.

Kon landed on his stomach, the breath knocked out of him. He was able to catch a glimpse of the creature's cloying stare, not so benevolent anymore, as it flowed back into the earth. His arm followed with it, going underground up to his shoulder.

"Help!" Kon cried at the top of his lungs, pulling harder.

Using his tactile telekinesis, he made a telepathic "envelope" a few molecules above the skin of his arm, then expanded it, freeing himself. The thing compensated, a long ropy tendril shooting up and looping around his neck, sticking tentacle-like to his face. He felt one creeping up a nostril and screamed in revulsion, but managed to get a leg up underneath him and pulled again.

This time he managed to force himself to his feet, dragging the creature out of the hole. Part of it, anyway. What had once been the puppy dog was now just a fleshy bulb hanging off the end of one thick tentacle, spooled back into the main body. Kon could see now that it was bait, like that of an anglerfish. And he had been stupid enough to fall for it.

If Tim heard about this, he'd never live it down.

"Get off me!" Kon shouted, pretty sure the creature couldn't understand him. He felt the repeated kicks to the tentacle's trunk got the message through pretty clear, though.

An arrow thudded into the stalk. Kon felt the thing shudder against his skin in something like fear. He looked over his shoulder to see Robin standing on the crest of a sand dune, silhouetted by the setting sun and nocking another arrow.

"You might hit me!" Kon tried to point out, but he got so far as "You might" before Tim let loose his shot.

Kon felt the wind of it passing his ear before it cut into the stalk, thick dollops of yellowing cream leaking out of the wound. It smelled like old rubber and Kon felt the scent of it would make him pass out. He managed to get a foot under the rock he had dropped in the struggle. After kicking it up into the air, he caught it in his free hand and brought it against the stalk. Something cracked inside it and with a keen cry of pain, the tentacle retreated underground, leaving behind only a slimy residue on his newly freed arm.

"That was messed up," Kon said, wiping his hand on his shirt as best he could. "And why'd you make _arrows_ anyway? You have Batarangs."

Tim shrugged as he replaced the bow on his back. "Needed something to pass the time. You okay?"

Kon wiped the last of the slime off on his jeans. "A little soggy, but I'll be fine." He looked down the creature's hole. "And there's more where that came from, buddy!"

"I'm sorry I was such a jerk," Tim said forty minutes into the walk back. "That's what drove you away, right? Me acting all... Batman's Nephew?"

"I'd downgrade that to twice-removed."

"It's just that I'm trained to be that person. Go all Rambo, ya know? Monosyllabic, no emotional intimacy..."

"I don't want you be emotional intimate or whatever, I just want you to crack a smile once in a while."

"You could try saying something funny," Tim quipped.

Kon grinned. "See? That's what I'm talking about! We can't afford to go all squirrelly. After all, we might be stuck here for a while."

Tim sighted the rock. They broke into a jog towards it. "Yeah, but at least we'll have each other."

"Dude, that sounds kinda gay. You can get away with that here, because we're on a abandoned desert planet, but people'll give you funny looks if you use it on the street."

"Thanks for the warning. I'm lucky to have you to tell me all these things."

"Damn straight."

 

 

 


End file.
